Ride Your Fears

Have you seen Twisters? It was a fun, popcorn thrill-ride of a movie (and possibly completely unnecessary, but I’ll leave that to the movie critics of the world to argue). However, there was a line in the film that stuck with me.

The characters are having a discussion about fear, and Glen Powell, as the cowboy tornado chaser Tyler Owens, says, “You don’t face your fears. You ride ‘em”

“You don’t face your fears. You ride ‘em.”

This got me thinking—could this be sound advice? Could there be a nugget of wisdom hidden in this completely realistic and scientifically accurate film about chasing tornadoes? (Please note the sarcasm there.) Well, I decided to look into it.

First, let’s take a page from Approach-Avoidance Theory*. Imagine you went to your boss with an idea you thought was brilliant. You expected them to instantly promote you and parade you around the office, singing your praises as the office savior. Only…that didn’t happen. Instead, you were treated to a tirade—not only for interrupting them but also for presenting what they deemed a hot garbage plan that could ruin the company. You left their office with your tail between your legs.

Now…maybe your boss overreacted. But flash forward to two weeks later. You think you’ve cracked the code. You were in the shower when suddenly—yahtzee!—you figured out how you could make the idea work, saving the company thousands of dollars in the process. You rush out of the shower, almost forgetting to dry off, and write your ideas down. Later that day, you approach your boss’s office. And as you take each additional step, you start getting nervous. Butterflies—or maybe rattlers—churn in your stomach with each step.

You’re confused because, on the one hand, you’re excited about the possibilities. But you’re also terrified that your boss might react similarly—or worse—than before!

These feelings dance around in your brain the more you think about the potential outcomes. The trick to navigating this challenging road is to ride these seemingly conflicting emotions so that you can get to your destination.

Wow, apparently Tyler Owens might be onto something! But…before we all start riding our own tornadoes, let’s dig a little deeper.

When it comes to behavioral sciences, meta-analyses have shown that facing fears in a controlled way can lead to changes in attitudes, intentions, and behaviors. Here’s the trick: you don’t get rid of the fear. That’s not the goal. The goal is to ride the fear and develop a new relationship with it.

So, Tyler’s differentiation between facing a fear vs. riding a fear is a valid one. Too often, we either plunge headlong into a fear and fall flat on our face (or get shot out of the tornado) or turn tail and run. The trick is to dance with the fear—to learn to ride it.

So, what fear have you been avoiding? Is it signing up for an online dating profile? Risking rejection of an idea or product as you try to sell it at work? What is your tornado?

You don’t need to face it. Just figure out how to ride it and work with it.

That’s, how you tap back in.

…maybe just don’t try it with a tornado.